[opening theme music]
Somebody please cue that bird?
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats Oooh yeah♪
♪ Who do you call When you want some pepperoni?♪
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ Right on!♪
♪ They're stepping out crime♪
♪ And you know That ain't baloney♪
♪ There's Speedy Cerviche He's the leader of the bunch♪
♪ That's right! A heck of a fighter♪
♪ Makes a heck of a lunch.♪
♪ And little Polly Esther♪
♪ Who's never afraid That's me!♪
♪ Of going into battle When the bad guys invade.♪
♪ Here's Guido Anchovis A wild romantic rover.♪
♪ This cat gets down down With a love hangover♪
♪ Here come the Pizza Cats They're so bad.♪
♪ They've got more fur Than any turtle ever had!♪
♪ They're stronger Than old cheese♪
♪ Stronger than old cheese♪
♪ Stronger than dirt♪
♪ Step on their tails♪
♪ Get off my tail♪
♪ And you're gonna get hurt Don't hurt me♪
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ They're fighting crime All over town♪
♪ Four, three, two, one♪
♪ The Pizza Cats Are on the run♪
♪ The Big Cheese is the villain Who's lower than low.♪
♪ It's a rotten shame He lives in Little Tokyo.♪
♪ We've got a nasty Bad Bird And some nasty Ninja Crows.♪
♪ As soon as someone finds The script♪
♪ We might begin the show.♪
♪ Sit back and rest your feet And turn the sound up high♪
♪ And if you want The full effects♪
♪ Go eat a pizza pie♪
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
[narrator] There's an old legend
we just made up for this episode
that one a comet streaks by the earth
every thousand years or so.
The people who watch it together become mated for life.
As you can see a comet has just entered our solar system.
And will be passing by the earth in a couple of days.
We're trying to keep the event under wrap
so we don't start a panic among the people.
It's coming!
The comet is coming, you all getting married.
Well that secret didn't last long.
You know who you wanna spend your life with?
I was thinking of calling Madonna.
[laughing] And I've got some swamp land
in New Choice that I'd like to sell you too.
-It's coming! -[giraffe screams]
[indistinct shouting]
[narrator] It's amazing that a simple ball of space gas
could cause so much indigestion on earth.
It's all plan.
We'll watch the comet tomorrow and get married in June.
Oh it's so romantic.
I wish the comet come around when I got married.
[narrator] When you got married dinosaurs came around.
-Oh, shut up! -It's coming!
[narrator] Well at least our heroes
the Pizza Cats haven't given
into the madness sweeping the city.
We can hold the reception at my brother's place.
I wonder what he'll charge me.
I'll make him the best man,
he'll throw in the food for free.
I can see it now.
We'll have a wedding cake made out of tuna fish.
Who comes up with these lines?
I've got my dream beau all picked out.
He came in today and ordered pizza to go.
That's great is he tall, dark and handsome?
No, he's short, fat and ugly but is rich.
-[Francine laughing] -Oh, brother.
Well, it only comes by in a thousand years.
Who you gonna be with?
Hey, I hear Speedy is available.
[Polly gasps] What? Why did you play with a short deck?
What do you mean? He's a good catch.
-And he likes you. -[Polly gasps]
What? I don't like him.
He is goofy.
[Francine] He doesn't look goofy now.
Maybe you hurt his feelings.
[Polly sighs]
Hey Speedy why are you so serious?
Aren't you excited about the comet like everybody else?
[Speedy grunts]
-I don't care about the comet. -[Polly gasps]
Listen Polly I've had a lot on my mind
and this is something I'd like to talk over with you.
It's very important so I hope you'll pay attention.
And not make fun of me as usual!
Do you have any time tonight?
Sure Speedy if you want.
Fine, then I'll see you after work.
I'm going for a walk
there's still some things I need to sort out.
I never seen him so downcast before.
It must be serious, maybe his decided to sell his
-comic book collection. -[Polly sighing]
[narrator] It can't be money
he claimed two dollars in tips just last week.
But speaking of money
there's a financial crisis going on at the palace
someone got their hand caught
- in the cookie jar. -[bird squawking]
You crook.
You've been stealing from us. Admit it!
-Right now! [screaming] -[panda screaming]
[Big Cheese] It's not true!
We just had a bad year.
I don't know where the money went.
-I live a very humble lifestyle. -[Princess Vi] You do not!
You got more clothes then I do,
-You got more shoes then I do, -[panda groaning]
[Princess Vi] You got more makeup then I do!
-No princess. -[panda mumbling]
[Big Cheese crying]
-[panda mumbling and groaning] -I swear I bought all that stuff
-at yard sale. -[panda groans]
Quiet I don't wanna hear your lies.
We've been keeping track of your thievery.
Since you've been prime minister
the royal revenues are drop to nothing.
And we've been raising taxes from the last five years.
How do you explain that Mr. big mouth?
The truth is I've never been very good at math.
One and one is, let's see ya, hmm.
-Fraud! -Don't try acting dumb with me!
Everyone knows one and one is three.
I wanna know what you did with all the money.
We don't have enough cash left in the vault
to buy an ice cream cone.
[Big Cheese] Surely the princess is exaggerating.
No I'm not! My check bounced at the soda shop.
-She said that? -[Big Cheese crying]
-I tell you what Cheese, --[Big Cheese crying]
if it were me I think about giving it all back to her.
After all what good will it do you to be rich
if she sends you to Extras Island.
[Big Cheese crying]
It's only money!
It's too late I spent all in a new weapon. [sobbing]
You can't give it back?
This is serious that little brat will skin you alive.
Maybe you can save yourself by resigning.
You can always move to the country
and grow potatoes for the rest of your life.
[Big Cheese] What do I look like some kind of spud grabber?
[Big Cheese grunting]
-I refuse to resign. [grunting] -It's the only way.
We're all going to end up in jail.
I've a got a plan.
-Now listen carefully. -Yes, sir!
Here's what we'll do--
-What's this? -Hearing aid.
Right. Anyway here is my plan...
[Big Cheese whispering]
Wait a minute you can't do that! You might destroy everything.
Who cares if this doesn't work.
I'm gonna destroyed so what's the difference?
This is my last chance to go for the whole ball of wax.
At a time like this I don't need critics.
What I need are supporters I can count on.
So tell me are you with me or against me? [screaming]
[Jerry Atric] I'm with you Seymour
but you've got to admit the plan
is a little risky, don't you think?
-I'm desperate I tell ya. -[Jerry Atric grunts]
The situation is worse than you know.
I cleaned out everything.
I even emptied the princess's piggy bank.
-Does she know yet? -I don't think so.
When she does she's gonna feed me to the sharks.
So I have to go all the way there's no turning back.
[Bad Bird] So that's the deal, eh.
We're faced with the final confrontation.
I wonder if my insurance premiums are paid up.
[Bad Bird gasps]
-Who's hiding there? -[Carla laughs]
[Carla laughs] It's just me, darling.
What? Carla it's you!
You finally came back.
-[Carla moaning] -[Bad Bird grunts]
I haven't seen you for a long time.
What made you come here today?
You mean you don't remember?
You told me to meet you here when we were separated.
I've forgotten. [gasps]
Wait came back!
Carla my sweet!
Don't leave me!
Meet me at the bridge by the castle.
I came here as you asked me to Bad Bird
but where were you? [cries]
I'm sorry Carla,
but for a ninja crow love is forbidden.
[Bad Bird cries]
Good bye now.
What? I can't believe it!
You love me so much you are willing to wait
even though I lied to you and deserted you?
Uh-huh, even though you treated me like garbage,
I know deep in your heart you love me.
You just have a different way of showing it, that's all.
[Bad Bird crying]
We can watch the comet together,
then you could give up been a ninja and marry me.
-[Bad Bird cries] -Isn't it about time?
I guess you're right I'll do it.
You really mean it?
Yes, but first I have one last job to complete.
It's important if I don't do it
I'll have failed the ninja code of honor.
I can never show my face at the ninja retirement home
unless I settled score with the Pizza Cats.
[Polly and Guido] What's up Big Al?
I just wanted to let you know
how pleased we are with your performance.
And to tell you that we're renewing your superhero contract
for an additional five years.
All right! Now I can buy that kitty condo.
And I can take that vacation to Hawaii I've been putting off.
I better look good in a grass skirt.
And I can buy a cycle
and join the professional dirty bike circuit.
[laughs] I've been dying to burn some rubber.
Hmm that's remind me, where is Speedy?
He was real moody so he took a walk to clear his head.
[Al Dente] When he'll be back?
I guess when his head is empty.
-[Francine and Polly laughing] -[Al Dente] Very funny girls.
Call me when he shows up.
[Lucille humming]
[Lucille gasps]
Hi there Speedy.
I said hi there Speedy.
I'm sorry Lucille.
[Speedy sighs]
This is the most impressed I've ever seen you get Speedy.
-So what's new? -[Speedy grunts]
I've something on my mind I can't talk about it.
Even with you Lucille.
Come on you can tell me, I'm dying to know
I can't stand it when people blab their secrets.
[narrator] Actually she doesn't give a hoot
about Speedy's problems
but she has to read whatever is in the script .
-[Lucille laughs] -No matter what you say,
I'm not gonna tell ya.
It's very personal and I have to work it out on my own.
See you later Lucille.
Come back, you didn't even make usual stupid faces at me.
You can't leave yet.
Hey she's right.
[Speedy grunting and screaming]
[Speedy and Lucille gasp]
[crowd screaming and mumbling]
It is an earthquake?
-Is it a volcano? -[Francine moans]
[narrator] No, it's something worse than that.
It's the ultimate evil plot. It's the revenge of Big Cheese.
[crowd screaming]
What is that thing?
[suspenseful music] [crowd screaming]
[Lucille moaning]
[Big Cheese] Attention residents of the city.
This is your former prime minister speaking,
I advise you to get as far away from the structures you can.
It contains a powerful weapon
and you might get hurt if you try to approach it.
We're in the process of activating the weapon now
Checking angle, trajectory and distance.
Here we go!
[exciting music]
[animal] He's deflecting the comet.
[animal 2] It's heading right for us.
[animal 3] It will destroy the city!
[Big Cheese] I was fired today so I decided to take action.
Here's the deal, make me your emperor
and I'll send the comet back into space.
Otherwise everything is going up in smoke.
Here's the professor with an instant analysis.
We have a very dangerous situation.
Big Cheese has altered the course of the comet
so that it's headed for the heart of the city.
We have very little time to meet his demands
because the comet will soon reach a point of no return
and then we won't be able to alter its course
no matter how hard we try.
So you better do what he says get it close and close.
[Big Cheese] Just to re-emphasize
the professor's report
this is your final offer take it or leave it.
And you better make up your mind soon.
And don't even think of attacking the structure
it's protected by my ninja crows,
plus a lot of booby traps, so dare.
[Al Dente] Well, Big Cheese has really gone and done it now.
He's forced us to pull out all the stops
and initiate our final battle plan.
Everyone must work together
if we're to achieve victory is that clear?
-[all] Yes. -[Speedy] Wait a minute.
[Francine] Speedy, where have you been?
Off in a cloud.
But I'm back now and I have a question for Big Al.
All right!
Francine is gonna take orders over the phone Big Al
but why are you making her part
of the Pizza Cats fighting force?
Shouldn't she be back at our launching post?
Well I suppose it's time I told you.
I've been conducting secret training missions for Big Al.
That's right! She's heading the force of backup Pizza Cats.
[all] You mean the other Pizza Cats?
Correct! So don't give me any lip
or you'll end up in early retirement.
Now let's go to work and save the city.
Are you ready?
[Polly, Guido and Speedy scream]
[Francine chuckling]
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ They make great pizza But that ain't all♪
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ They're ready to fight When you need 'em just call♪
♪ They know how to stop crime Just do what they say.♪
♪ If you don't want a bad time Stay out of their way!♪
♪ Oh I love those cats♪
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ The heroes Who always wear fur♪
[theme music continues]
[Francine] We speed out of the West at six knots.
Target is sighted and locked in.
Are we ready? Good.
[Francine] Attention! We're about to launch
the Pizza Cats out their most dangerous mission.
Please stay back of the wait line
or you may suffer the following injuries,
terminal dandruff, terminal acne or terminal hiccups.
Have a nice day!
Stand by.
There they go!
Can I be a Pizza Cat when I'm in their age?
I doubt it but one thing, you're a dog.
And for another thing, you don't have the right agent.
But I'm willing to take the training course.
How did you know about that?
It was supposed to be the big surprise of this episode.
-Oh yeah? -Yeah.
-It was in the teaser. -[Momma Mutt grunts]
Polly when this is all over
I still wanna talk to you tonight.
Yeah, if we survive.
Guys, we're headed for a wall.
-Yep, you're right. -Good eyes Guido.
[Speedy, Guido and Polly screaming]
[Speedy, Guido and Polly grunting and groaning]
[all screaming] [siren alarm]
[Speedy] All right Pizza Cats this is it!
Prepare yourselves for a fight to the finish.
And remember: Make no prisoners!
[Guido] You might as well run away
and save yourselves a beating.
You're not the ones we want.
Our mission triumph over evil,
so if we hurt you it's only because we love ya.
You know you'll never be able to beat us.
We're the stars of the show.
[crow] You think you're tough enough to take us all on?
[all] That's right!
[all] And if they don't get you, we will!
-Crows attack! -[crows cawing]
[Speedy grunting]
[crow grunting]
-[General Catton screams] -[crows screaming]
[crows screaming]
[Meowzma screams]
Speedy, you and the others go after the Big Cheese.
We'll take care of these half pie warriors.
You've got more important fish to fry.
Yeah, you're right. We gotta get going.
-Hey guys, time to move out. -[Polly and Guido] You said.
Watch yourselves,
-be prepare to anything. -[Polly and Guido] Right!
Look! Here they come, they've broken through,
they're headed right for us.
In case you forgot that's how we planned.
[Big Cheese grunts] These cats are dangerous
go on do something.
Fine, here's the first booby trap.
[all scream]
-That wasn't very friendly. -[Speedy and Polly sigh]
-[Speedy and Guido scream] -[Polly grunts and screams]
[Polly groans and screams]
She must've sprained her little finger.
So what, she's still better of than the rock.
[Bad Max laughing]
So the deep dish trio it seems we meet again.
[all] And will be the last time!
This as far as we let you go.
Don't be ridiculous big brain you're not gonna stop us.
-Right boys? -[Speedy grunts]
Hi-you Speedy!
-[Speedy screams] -[Ninja Crows gasp]
[Polly grunting]
-[Ninja Crows grunting] -You brats!
Sorry, wanna us to run that by you again?
-Go ahead Speedy! -What?
Go on take care of the Big Cheese.
You got a clear run. We'll catch up to you.
[Guido] And whatever you do get control of that weapon.
-Come back! -[Guido grunts]
-Forget about us? -You've had pal.
[suspenseful music]
Why don't we do something to stop this?
We're trying your highness
but the comet has gotten too close.
If we don't lose the weapon to knock it off course
I'm afraid we're all doomed.
Send that comet to the Prisoner Island.
[panda screams]
[Al Dente] Come on cats, time is running out.
[Speedy] I'll have to cut my way through.
Here it goes.
This is it! Wow! Look at the size of this thing.
-Weird. -[Bad Bird laughing]
It's time to settle the score Speedy.
[suspenseful music] [Speedy and Bad Bird grunt]
[Speedy and Bad Bird grunting and screaming]
[Speedy screams]
You're too slow.
Next time you'll be defeated, I swear.
No way pal.
[narrator] I hate to be a spoilsport
but while these two worry as stirring each other down
that comet it is getting very close to its point of no return.
Too bad for the city.
If they don't want me to be emperor
they can live in a crater
'cause that's all what will be left.
[narrator] That doesn't leave much room for negotiation.
I guess it all comes down to a little cat
in a funny suit with a big sword
Now, don't get mad fellas but we're not gonna be able
to finish the story in this episode.
[Bad Bird and Speedy scream]
[narrator] I told ya not to get mad.
We'll resolve this whole mess in our next episode
of Samurai Pizza Cats.
[narrator] Ladies and gentleman the Samurai Pizza Cat
fan club oath.
The Pizza Cats are Samurai
and I'd like to note.
Their antics take your breath away.
Like furballs in your throat.
We kittens are special breed, we never call retreat.
[Guido] Whenever Big Cheese knocks us down.
We land upon our feet.
[narrator] So hail to thee, oh Pizza Cat
please ring your little bell.
Although you may be pen and ink
you know you'll fight like...
[all] Pizza Cats!
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ We hope you liked the show ♪
♪ It's the best That we could do♪
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ If you could do better Then we'd leave it up to you♪
♪ Just a reminder You might like to know♪
♪ The cats will be back For another big show♪
♪ Oh gosh.♪
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ They're fighting crime Oh yes♪
♪ All over town.♪
♪ Two, four, six, eight.♪
♪ Why do we expectorate?♪
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ Read all the credits♪
♪ So you'll know Who did the work♪
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪